A Glimpse Inside the Mind of a Five Year Old

Some great Emma comments/questions from the last few days:

(After discovering her friend Brianna wasn't at the gym b/c her brother is having surgery) "Well, she could have come by herself, you know. That's just not a very good excuse."

(Heading to Potbelly's for lunch) "Yay! We're going to Hotbelly's! I'm gonna blow really hard on my food so my belly doesn't burn up."

"Boy, Sophie sure is stubborn. She just loves to hit my buttons."

"My new friend is 7 years old, and she said she would wait until I turned 7 too before she had another birthday so we can be the exact same age!"

"Wow, there sure are a lot of ambli-ences on the road today. I guess a lot of people are hurt. I bet the ambli-ence drivers are really excited!"

"Daddy, does my brain grow?"

"I love needles, like the needle they used with the spray on my arm when I was brave and I only cried a little bit and now needles are my friend."

"Grandpa Kitty told me that if who's on first, then what's on second? But I don't understand why that's funny."

"If Daddy's 4 and 2 years old, then doesn't that make him 6?"

"I am really good at taking a bath and scrub scrub scrubbing all my dirty skin off! Except when Sophie poops in the bath and then you yell 'Bath time's over!' and we jump out of the water so we don't get icky poo on our clean skin."

"No matter what, I will always be older than Sophie because I'm her big sister and that's my job."

"Callie told me that if you swallow gum in your tummy then it makes you fart bubbles."

Family Weekend Part 2

We spent last Sunday at the Culver beach for the 2nd annual Nelson family reunion. It was so nice to see everybody. Gran told us about some of our ancestors, including brothers that fought in the Civil War (four for the North, four for the South, only one survived...and thank God for that, or none of us would be here!) and World War II. My cousin Lisa showed the kids how to make their own ice cream, which Emma talked about for days afterward. The girls went for a swim in the lake with Daddy, Uncle Dave and Callie...or actually, Emma did. Sophie shrieked like a banshee the minute the lake water touched her precious skin and ended up on a walk with Mommy instead.

Lots of food, sun and catching up. All in all, an exhausting but fulfilling day with my very photogenic family!

Four Generations of Nelsons!

Family Weekend Part 1

Pat and Dave are in town right now, and the girls are in heaven with Grandma and Grandpa Kitty at their beck and call. Here are some pics from our weekend so far...
Tomorrow is the Nelson family reunion...day trip to Indiana! Family overload!!!

Plugging Away

I signed up for my first 5K the other day.

It should have been an exciting step for me, but I just can't seem to gather up the requisite enthusiasm. Maybe it's because I have been working out 5-6 days a week for over a year now, and yet I am the exact same size and weight as I was 12 months ago. Intellectually, I know full well that this situation stems from my particular love for all foods sugary, fatty or fried. Truly, I am so anti-healthy food that I will often go hungry rather than eat a vegetable if that's all that's available to me. It's a sad, sad thing, but it's all I know...I've been this way as long as I can remember. For a long, long time I got away with it...and then all of a sudden I didn't, and many many many pounds later, here I am. There is no denial - I get it. I am fully aware that I am not only an over-eater, but also a junk-eater, and that I got to where I am today through no one's fault but my own. It's a problem with many tangled roots that I am just beginning to sort. I'm hopeful that I'll eventually get a handle on my eating, but regardless of my success (or lack thereof) in this area, I am quite certain I will have food issues for the remainder of my life. Everybody battles at least one demon. Mine is food, plain and simple.

Although I know I have a long way to go nutrition-wise before anyone would do a double take when passing me on the street (unless they are checking out the rather alarming dimensions of my ass), I'm still perplexed as to why my body hasn't changed more from all the exercise I do. I know that many people say they "work out" or "exercise," and these terms can mean anything from taking a leisurely stroll to running a marathon. I would say I fall somewhere in the middle of those two. I'm definitely not an athlete, but I do work really hard. When I'm at the gym, I'm all business. There is no autopilot, no halfway. I am sweating and heaving and pumping my heart out for 60 minutes or more every time. And on the inside, I feel great! I feel powerful, I feel strong. (Well, most of the time...there's always the occasional day when I am convinced I'll have to be rolled out of the gym on a stretcher.) But you'd never know my strength - or how hard I've worked, and continue to work - by looking at me. Which is rather depressing, and may be why I've stopped reaching crazy levels of euphoria whenever I hit a new milestone like lifting more weight, raising my RPMs, or signing up for my first race. It's not that I'm unexcited...it's just that my excitement is waning. And why shouldn't it? Everyone thrives on positive reinforcement, it's human nature. But you can only boost your own morale for so long, and no one else has any clue how hard I'm working b/c I have the body of a thoroughly dedicated couch potato. And even if someone did try to be encouraging, what are people supposed to say? I don't know what form their encouragement could possibly take that wouldn't be at worst insulting and at best patronizing. "Oh Jen, I'm so proud of you that you've been working so hard...that double chin and excess flab are looking GOOD!" or "Don't worry Jen, even if every person you encounter sees you only as a lazy lump of surplus flesh with arms bigger than an average person's calves, what matters is that deep in your heart, you know just how strong you really are."

It's a frustrating situation, but despite my above foray into self-pity, this last year and a half has brought me crucial self-knowledge for which I am most grateful. The most baffling thing I've discovered about myself in my entire adult life is that I do, in fact, love to exercise. I need it, I crave it, and I turn hella cranky if I can't get my hands on it...much like my relationship with chocolate, actually. I just wish my body revealed a little more of my exercise addiction and a little less of my food addiction.

Oh well. Possibly the balance will eventually shift. Or perhaps I'll decide one day to stop undermining my best efforts in the gym with every single thing I put in my mouth. Or maybe I am already the best me I can be while still remaining sane and sated, and this is how I'll look the rest of my life. Time will tell. The bottom line is that I may never be able to give up my favorite foods. However, I DO know that I will never ever ever give up exercise.

Hello...bye bye

Talking on the phone is almost like a rite of passage for toddlers, but honestly, it's so damn cute...

Happy Birthday, Emma Bloom!

Emma had a wonderful birthday weekend, even though it began with a huge disappointment. The girls' beloved Grandma Kitty got sick and had to cancel her planned trip from Florida. We were all so sad she and Dave couldn't make it, but the upside was having my Mom and Callie spend the weekend with us instead. As bummed as Emma was, having her best friend with her for all the birthday activities definitely helped soften the blow of Grandma & Grandpa Kitty's absence. As Callie aptly declared upon arrival, "Happy Birthday Emma...I'm your birthday gift!"

Saturday was a long but ultimately successful day. Last year at Em's birthday party, her cake actually melted in the 80+ degree sun. This year, party day was windy, rainy and cold. We'd planned to celebrate at a nearby park and take advantage of the playground for instant kid entertainment, but a sudden downpour forced us to improvise. Chris stood in the rain and directed guests from the park to our place, while I frantically set up for an impromptu indoor party in about 15 minutes. Although the switch was a bit stressful for the parental units, we managed to fit 40 people at least somewhat comfortably into our apartment - and miraculously, everyone seemed to have a great time. Here's a pic of our dear friend Sam rocking a lovely princess ensemble while surrounded by party guests, and then a photo of Emma blowing out the candles on her cake (with some help from friends).
Sunday was awesome. The kids played all day long, and that evening we took Emma and Callie downtown to see the musical Mary Poppins. This was Emma's big birthday gift from her Daddy and me, and we were nervous that she might not last through a three hour show. But both girls were total rock stars. The play was full of illusions to keep the kids (and us, frankly!) entertained, but the best trick of the night was when Mary Poppins "flew" above the audience and hovered mid-air right in front of us. The girls' faces at that moment were aglow with such delicious amazement that my heart hurt just watching them. I would have loved the play regardless of who I saw it with, but nothing beats experiencing something through the eyes of a child. Callie declared after the show that she was so glad she got to see "the real Mary Poppins," and both girls kept their eyes on the sky the entire ride home, hoping for a magical glimpse of Mary flying with her umbrella.

Here we are all dressed up before hitting the theater (well, except Miss Sophie, who was decked out in pjs before hitting her crib), and then the girls after the show, still bouncing off the walls as they show off their Playbills.
Of course, all good things must come to an end. Mom and Cal left yesterday, and Emma is now home from school on her birthday, sick with fever....AGAIN. But she has lots of new toys to keep her busy, and more presents to look forward to this weekend in Indiana. She is a very lucky child to have so many people in her life who love her, although frankly, she is so very easy to love.

Happy birthday, my baby.

Happy Birthday, Chris!

Too Photogenic

We went to get the girls' pictures taken today, and they turned out really well. In case you can't tell, I had trouble choosing...especially when it came to our almost-five-year-old! Enjoy.