Reason number 1,379 that I love Emma

Em and I were talking true love this morning, and she wanted to know why her Daddy and I got married. "Well," I explained, "I married Daddy because I love him very much and I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. And I think Daddy married me for the same reasons."

Emma nodded and then added thoughtfully, "Yeah, and also because you are beautiful."

I am only 35!

Dropping off Emma at school today, I met a new classmate of hers...two-year-old Vivian.
"Hi Vivian!" I said. "Nice to meet you."
"Hi," Vivian replied. "Are you Emma's grandma?"

Sophie speaks

Sophie says four words: uh-oh, dat (that), mama and dadu (daddy). She will say none on command. In fact, trying to get her to repeat anything else almost always ends in frustration.

I just finished talking with my Mom on the phone. Before saying our goodbyes, I held the phone up to Sophie's ear so she could hear Grandma's voice. I prompted, "Say 'Hi, Grandma!'" Without missing a beat, Sophie immediately mimicked, "Hi, Ga-ma." After much shrieking, we hung up. I then tried to get Sophie to say variations of "Hi" for about ten minutes, to no avail. Finally, I gave up.

Looking deep into Soph's eyes, I asked, "Child, who are you?"

"Uh-oh," she answered before crawling away.

Sophie at 14 months

Sophie is 14 months old today. Here is a snapshot of her right now:

• Where Emma goes, Sophie follows...and if faced with a closed door, Sophie gets flat on her stomach and tries to climb under the door to get to her sister.
  
• Pulls herself up to Emma's table and then screams until Emma gives her whatever it is she wants.
• Has just started getting into books. She loves "Moo, Baa, La La La," "Snuggle Puppy," "Peekaboo Kisses." Will not tolerate "Bellybutton Book" or "But Not the Hippopotamus."
  
• Inhales Gerber's Lil Crunchers as if her life depends on it.
• Loses her mind whenever anyone else is eating or drinking something within her line of sight and not sharing with her.
  
• Drinks whole milk and apple juice, but if you give her a cup of water she throws it across the room.
  
• When in doubt, sing. She adores being sung to. Favorite songs: "Twinkle Twinkle," "Itsy Bitsy Spider," "You Are My Sunshine."
• Points to anything new or interesting and says, "Dat?"
  
• If you say "Kisses!" she says "Mmmmm" and gives you a big, open-mouthed kiss.
• Just learned to say, "Ta-da!"
• Uses the word "uh-oh" frequently and appropriately.
• Spends a good part of every day in the gym nursery climbing up and down the same set of three stairs.
• Like her older sister, she is a food hoarder. Around dinnertime, you can often find her last bite from lunch still stuck in her mouth.
• Loves splashing in the bath. Without fail, every time you take her out she kicks and screams.
• Gets manic when overtired and rocks back and forth from knee to knee, turning her body and shaking her head until she becomes so dizzy that she falls over.
• Says "Hola" but still only waves "Hi." Also, will only say "Hola" to her nursery buddy Eslie.
• Must have something in her hand when her diaper is being changed or she will kick/hit/scratch/scream/twist like hell until the torture is over.
• Enjoys plopping onto her back and then rolling back and forth, as if she's making an armless snow angel.
• Makes a high-pitched shrieking sound when happy or excited that sounds a bit like one of the velociraptors in Jurassic Park.
  
• As she is still crawling, Sophie often reminds us of a puppy: she begs for food, gives us "sad eyes" when she wants something, comes to us when we say, "Come here, Sophie...here, Sophie!", eats most of her food on the floor, plays fetch, loves to have her tummy rubbed...actually, I'll stop here b/c the correlations are rather alarming.
  

Odds and Ends

I gave Sophie her first haircut yesterday. I cut about 1.5 inches off the back so it wouldn't look so mullet-y. Her hair looks pixie-like now. Considering the fact that she totally FREAKED OUT the entire time I was doing it, I think it looks pretty darn good.
Today my dear friend Meg stopped by with her little Isabella. I had forgotten how small and wonderful a two-month-old feels! Emma immediately claimed Meg for herself and informed me that they wanted "alone time" to play. Sophie was napping, so I got to lay on the bed with Isabella and just inhale her wonderful infant smell as she drifted in and out of sleep. She is such an angel. And we even got a smile out of her!
In other random news, Sophie's new favorite thing in the world is the book "Moo, Baa, La La La." She carries it with her throughout the house, whining/growling/screaming until someone agrees to read it to her. She also loves to stand, so she pulls herself up to anything and everything, hangs for awhile, and then begins screeching because she wants down but can't remember how to do it. Both of these things were really cute at first, but have quickly turned annoying.

Emma spent her time in the gym nursery today "exercising" with one of the caregivers, Celia. When I came to pick her up, I found her stripped down to her tank top and leggings because she and Celia had "worked-ed up a sweat." When I told Emma that I had been exercising too, she looked at me quizzically and said, "No Mommy, not pretend exercising...Celia and I were exercising for real."

Happy Inauguration Day!

This city - and, I have to assume, this entire country - is absolutely electrified today. From the moment I left the apartment this morning, you could feel the difference. Everyone has huge smiles on their faces. Strangers are waving hello to each other on the street. At a red light, the person next to me tooted his horn and mouthed "Go Barack!" with a fist pumped into the air. At the gym, five people in my power class were wearing Obama tee-shirts and three gym acquaintances hugged me, literally too full of joy to do anything other than share it. At the grocery store my cashier asked me, "Are you enjoying the first day of a new America?" The energy is tangible and contagious and refreshing and completely ALIVE.

Sophie and I just watched Obama's inauguration on TV, and I explained to her who is who and what they do for our country. I think she understands. When Senator Feinstein gleefully introduced "President Barack Obama," Sophie actually clapped. He kinda lost her during his speech, but for at least 20 seconds there, she was totally on board.

Hail to the Chief! And bless him as he fights the good fight. The Mathews family plans to do all we can to help.

Sophie Fights Back

Let the brawling begin. Sigh.

Little Miss Mouthy

Emma has always been (as described by others) "spirited," "animated," "challenging," "moody," "sensitive," and my personal favorite - "emotionally vibrant." Take your pick, the word(s) don't really matter - bottom line, she's a force of nature and has been from the moment she was born. The ferocity of her personality is one of the main things I adore about her, but it can also be a lot to handle...not just for others, but for her as well. She feels everything so intensely, and she still struggles to find an appropriate outlet for all that joy/anger/frustration/etc. when it overwhelms her. She's always been prone to tantrums, and Chris and I accepted long ago that these "emotional overloads," as I like to think of them, are just part of what makes Emma...well, EMMA. And Emma is pretty darn amazing, so if we gotta deal with a few glitches in the system, so be it. I mean, don't we all have a glitch here and there? We try to help her channel her energy in more positive ways, and she's gotten better as she has aged. I suspect, to one degree or another, this is something Em will always battle, and that's okay. We'll be there for her as much as we can, and together, hopefully, we'll all come out the other side.

However, my current problem with her isn't necessarily connected to her "emotionalness" - for lack of a better word. Or perhaps it is, but even if that's the case, it is still unacceptable. Lately Emma has developed a horrible habit of backtalking. She is rude and spiteful and prone to screaming her responses. She can even be really hurtful, saying things like "I hate you" and "I'll never love you ever again." At first, I rolled with it. "This is yet another phase," I thought to myself. "Just ride it out." I tried to stay as patient as I could. We let little things go and disciplined her relatively consistently when her behavior became excessive. I figured in time, once she saw we weren't going to put up with the sassing, it would get better. But in fact, it's getting worse...and I'm more than a little embarrassed to admit that I don't know what to do. We don't believe in physical punishment, so even though many many MANY times I've fantasized about giving her a good smack about the head just to relish the three-to-five seconds of stunned silence it would be sure to illicit, that is not an option. We've tried counting, time-outs, ignoring, discussing, role playing, taking things away, mimicking, shouting (well, I don't know if you could say we've consciously tried shouting, but unfortunately that technique has also been used), and nothing is working - at least not on a long-term basis. I've seriously started to consider washing her mouth out with soap, but I don't know what I could use that would be considered safe. I can't believe I just typed that last sentence, but I suppose it just speaks to my current desperateness. And the thing I can't keep from thinking is that she's only FOUR. I mean, if I feel this desperate now, how in the world am I gonna deal with her in five/ten/fifteen years?

It breaks my heart to hear my lovely, sweet, gentle daughter turn into a bossy, demanding, mean little diva... and not only with me, but with others as well. And it's embarrassing too, I'll admit it. As crazy as it gets me when she behaves rudely at home, it's all the more difficult to swallow when she does so in public. I'm horrified that a child of mine speaks to people in such an ugly way. And the worst thing is that I'm not really sure how to handle it anymore, and she knows it. Unfortunately, she's smart. (Oh, if only she weren't so clever! Cleverness in a child is highly overrated!) The minute she senses weakness, she pounces. And lately, she's been pouncing a lot.

So. Does anyone have any advice? Or maybe some free time to take my eldest off my hands for a couple weeks/months/years? Mostly I'm writing this to vent, and to create a written record for my older self to refer to. That way, the next time I find myself in a similar state of cluelessness, I can read that I've been there before, I made it through (I hope), and I'll do so again. Probably.

Family Day

Saturday was a great day. My Mom had been planning all week to come and visit us all if the weather remained remotely calm, but at the last minute Cara and the kids decided to join her. So the Mathews four spent a chaotic but lovely day holed up in the apartment with my Mom, two sisters, two nephews and niece. Emma and Callie ran off and played all day like usual, the adults played numerous games of Euchre and Scene It, and Grifin hovered in the weird nether-region between hanging with us and annoying the little ones. But what was really fun was watching the two babies together. Sophie and Cadin were sharing toys (um...sort of), having little conversations no one else could understand, taking off on crawling races to who knows where...whatever the activity, their interaction was fascinating. Here's a shot of Grandma with her arms really full, and Sophie and Cadin in mid-play (notice the Cheerios surrounding them on the floor...between the two of them our living room rug was swimming in Cheerios by the end of the day.)
It was a whirlwind day trip and everyone was gone by 7pm, but I can't think of a better way to spend a Saturday.

Best Line Ever

One of Emma's many strange delay tactics when it comes to bedtime is to insist that we sit there and watch her take a drink of water. Tonight I decided I'd had enough, and I gave her fair warning I wasn't gonna do it. Of course, once the time came, she started flipping out. As I was closing the door the last thing I heard was, "You used to do it every night when I was a kid Mommy, please!"

Emma on a Wednesday

• Puts her breakfast plate away without having to be asked and then responds to my expression of thanks with, "Well, it's the least I can do."
• Lays on my lap and watches Brother Bear in rapturous silence, periodically uttering in a quietly reverential voice, "I just love this movie."
• Stands on her bed shouting "NEVER!" over and over again while in a time out for sassing.
• Tells me that when she grows up I'll have to get her "one of those blue shavers you use to shaver your legs b/c I'm gonna be a girl Mommy so I need a blue shaver, not a black one like Daddy's."
• Protests when I pinch her thumb while trimming her nails, but then attempts to reassure me when she sees how badly I feel. "Don't be sad Mommy, please don't be sad. I know you didn't mean to, it was an accident." I smile and thank her for understanding. Then she continues, "It just really really hurts. Look Mommy, it's all red and poofy and...oh no, I think it's bleeding! I need a band aid, please please, it burns, it burns. Ooh, it hurts it hurts it really hurts, I maybe need to go to the doctor, do I have to go to the doctor Mommy, do I, do I? We should put on Neosporin or I'll hafta go to the hospital and get a shot, I don't want to get a shot, Mommy pleeeeeaaaaase, I don't want to get a SHOT!!" After collecting herself she says with a sigh, "Boy, you sure did give me a BIG boo-boo, Mommy."
• Commiserates with me when I explain that we aren't going to the gym today because my muscles are really sore from exercising yesterday. "Yeah, my muscles are sore from yesterday too," Emma agrees. "Really?" I ask. "Why are your muscles sore?" "Well," says Emma, "I ate a lot of food yesterday and that was too much exercise for my belly."
  
• Declares that Grandma is coming to see us soon and staying for a whole week. I clarify that Grandma is actually only coming for the weekend, and only if the weather clears. Emma absorbs this without complaint. Much later Em approaches me and says, "Grandma thinks she's coming on Saturday and Sunday, but really she's coming for Saturday and Sunday and Monday and Tuesday and Wednesday and Thursday and Friday and then Saturday again b/c I asked the snow to keep her here and it said yes."
• Dodges her little sister all morning while complaining repeatedly, "Ma-ma, Sophie's bothering me." Yet promptly bursts into tears after Sophie goes down for a nap, sobbing, "But I wasn't done playing with her!"
• Settles in her room for "quiet time." (From 1-3pm our rule is that, in lieu of a nap, she plays quietly in her room with the door closed while her sister sleeps and I work). Over the course of two hours, she emerges from her room at least 12 times to request the following: tape, paper, water, snacks, cups, help putting on her tattoo, help cutting snowflakes, potty breaks (3), hairbrush, blanket, slippers, help with her shirt sleeve, help with her buttons, lip balm, apple juice, chalk, hoodie, and paper towels to clean up "just a little spill." When quiet time is over, she innocently inquires, "Did you get all your work done, Mommy?"
• Takes her first ever bite of peanut butter celery and says with a shrug, "Well, I guess it's a little bit good." I urge her to taste it again. She tries a second nibble, flaps her hands in the air and shrieks, "I love it, I love it, I LOVE IT!" With her third bite she decides, "I don't like this, it's icky." Bite number four: "Okay, I guess I'll eat it, but I like blue cheese better." Ten minutes later she asks for more because "peanut butter celery is my favorite!"
• Wraps a blanket around her waist, declares herself a princess in a magic skirt, and tells me that I am her prince. She wears the "bee-YOOT-i-ful" skirt for about an hour before deciding, "I don't want to be a princess anymore. I'm just gonna turn back into a big girl now." She drops the blanket, spins in a circle and says quietly, "Done." Then she goes off, presumably to do big girl things.
  
• Nails question after question in her Brain Quest book, prompting me to state, "You know, you're pretty darn smart for a 4 year old." Em stops reading, wraps her arms around me, gives me a big squeeze and whispers in my ear, "Mommy, I love you so much."
  

Missing School

The first thing I saw this morning upon opening my eyes was Emma's face approximately 3 inches from mine. "Wake up, Mama!" she cried. "Today is a school day!"

After rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I took a good look at Emma as she stood impatiently beside my bed. To my enormous surprise, she was completely dressed from head to foot - including coat, boots, mittens and hat. She was even dangling Sophie's coat in her hand.

"Mama, Sophie's awake. I need help getting her out of the crib. I went potty and I can eat my breakfast bar on the way. We have to hurry or we'll miss morning songs!"

Granted, morning songs don't begin until about 9:45am and Emma roused me at about 7am, but who am I to dampen her eagerness? So we arrived at school very very early, and as I left Em instructed me to tell Daddy "not to pick me up until the clock says five!"

Em hasn't been to school in two weeks, and I guess she really missed it.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Oh goodness, I'm a bit behind on my postings here, aren't I? So sorry, we've just been a bit busy. We had a wonderful Christmas and the girls got huge piles of stuff to help further their spoiling. We spent four days in Indiana with my family, and the weather went from bitter cold with snow to strong winds and snow drifts to freezing rain, an ice storm, hail, regular rain, and finally 60+ degree temps with everything melting and huge floods. Crazy. But despite Mother Nature's mood swings, we were still able to see lots of family and even meet the newest Nelson, little Olivia. Oh, and I turned 35. But who wants to hear about that? Below is Sophie with Grandpa, the girls on Christmas night (with Sophie holding her new baby doll, which we've oh-so-originally dubbed Dolly, as in "Doll-ie"), and Callie, Em and Sophie goofing around with Grandma.
We were all fighting one form of sickness or another as we left on New Year's Day for a week in Florida with Chris's mom and stepfather. But just a few hours of glorious sun and warm temps restored us all. We spent most of our time at the beach or the pool, and the girls had a fantastic time with Grandma and Grandpa Kitty. We discovered that Sophie is a definite water baby and loves the taste of sand, and Emma would wear water wings and float in the pool 24/7 if she could. Emma cried most of the way to the airport because she didn't want to leave, so I'd say that means the trip was a success. Below are the girls with Chris and me on the beach at sunset, at the pool and with their Grandma and Grandpa Kitty.
We are now back home after being welcomed off the plane last night to news that Chicago is under a winter storm advisory and we are expected to have 8-11" of snow by tomorrow morning. Sigh. And because the world apparently doesn't accept "recovery after vacation" as a legitimate excuse to have a mental health day, I have to dash downtown now in the lovely snow to record a TV demo and then get Em to a birthday party out in the 'burbs before coming home to cook about 100 cookies for ICT's 24 hour project tomorrow.

But at least we have those Florida memories to keep us warm.